Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I still have a little drunk in my system
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
