WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
