at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
