I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
