What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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