Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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