Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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