I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
