all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
