He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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