I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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