My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Randomize
