Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
He kissed a someone with a penis
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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