Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
