Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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