If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
