Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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