Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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