yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize