don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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