winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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