Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I stole a fireplace last night.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
