I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
