i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
