it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Be still, my beating vagina.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Randomize
