In the future we'll all be gay
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I don't think brook has ever known best
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Randomize
