Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
