If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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