I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
