Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
