we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Holy sore nipples Batman
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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