We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
