So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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