Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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