To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
