Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
