How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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