thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
