Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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