There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Randomize
