I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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