Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
home. puking in laundry basket.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
