good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
