Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
