There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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