i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
