Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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