dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
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