we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
