its not stalking. its research.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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