ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
